Hear me Roar

I just read an article on CNN.com about new airport security technology that people are trying to ban due to the fact that they can "see you naked". I have several things to say in response to this.

1. Who cares if some random security guard locked in a room far away from the actual scanning site sees a faceless, blurry image of you naked?
2. This image is not being recorded, and chances are (unless you think VERY highly of yourself) unnamed guard is not going to remember you as he/she sees probably 10,000 naked blurry robot pictures in one day.
3. On the argument that security officials in LA are going to make millions by selling pictures of naked celebrities (see point one: they can's see your face) (see point two: they can't record the image) (SO yeah, what you're talking about is only a potential for the future, where it is also a potential that we will no longer need airports at all due to all the hover crafts and flying cars) also I'm pretty sure that most of said celebrities already have naked pictures of themselves circulating the Internet so nothing new there.
4. Aren't there enough important things going on in this world? Do we REALLY need to focus on this? I don't know if these scanners will really aid in stopping terrorists, or if they are worth spending the money on (hmmm, that would be a more worthwhile argument) but if they do I guess I don't really care if Joe Shmo gets at peek at the ladies.

Since I am ranting I have two other things to add:

1. (or is it 5?) I am SO sick of every fictional TV wedding being officiated by a woman. WE GET IT HOLLYWOOD, you are SO forward thinking and liberal. Oh wait, even my Southern Baptist church in GA had female pastors.
2. If Miley Cyrus is fat (or even 'normal'), I think I will just stay inside all summer.

Google This

Today is day 2 of my exercise free life.

SO with all my new found time (and trying not to move my leg as it is KILLING me) I have decided to try to broaden my online horizons. This is what I found so far.



After discovering a paragraph devoted to a fire breathing dragon in Job 41 I began to wonder, is there anyone out there who thinks that dragons/fire-breathing dinosaurs were real? You can imagine I was NOT disappointed by the barrage of google results, especially the fanatical Christian websites and conspiracy web pages. I did find one site that also traced the origins of the unicorn to their closely related (and actually real) cousins, the narwhals. You can imagine my delight. I decided not to reference the site as its creator had some less than ideal views on Jewish people and aliens. I digress

Eventually my fire breathing dinosaur googling led me to a website devoted to the robot below. I. AM. TERRIFIED.





A bit shaken up by what will soon become my latest nightmare about robots, I took a new approach to my surfing, and went straight to the news...you can see I immediately honed in on the important stuff. I was already planning on visiting NYC this year, so it wouldn't be crazy to just bump up my trip a little, right? And I am definitely interested in British affairs, so I expect I was already on the invite list for the benefit he will be attending...I always did like the bad boys...

Mutants Not Welcome Here

Today I went to the doctor and apparently I have torn a muscle in my leg doing this --well I was inside and I didn't look that cool, but nonetheless it really hurts! Sadly his remedy is not working out for A MONTH which means I'll probably end up looking like this. To make matters worse, or in other words to justify my self pity even more, he told me that I shouldn't go rock climbing at all due to my two mutant genetic blood conditions. (mutant condition X) (mutant condition Y) Up until now, I wasn't too worried about being a mutant for several obvious reasons:
1. I like X-Men and am currently awaiting confirmation that I have a superpower of some sort (I am hoping for unicorn vision or something involving elf ears)
2. It is cool to get up and roam the airplane with all the elderly people who are also avoiding mile high blood clots. We usually discuss our mutual love of knitting, V8, and living with more than 5 cats
3. My sister has hogged the medical drama in our family for too long--step aside Becky, for I too am a mutant (oh and by the way thanks for figuring out we had this and for dealing with a leg 10 sizes too big whilst 9 months pregnant...guess I owe you one)
4. My hematologist (that's right, I am 26 and have a hematologist, AND a podiatrist...not sexy?) said it really wouldn't affect my life and that since I am healthy and active I didn't need to change my lifestyle (except for popping a baby aspirin every once and a while). While apparently, she forgot to mention rock climbing. Not that I'm that much of a climber, but it was one of only a few lines I know to throw out at parties to increase my "serious and mysterious" factor since we all know the boys like rock climbing girls (Seriously guys, is it the spandex? Or the danger (sorry, not too dangerous when you're attached to a HARNESS and there is a BOUNCY FLOOR waiting to catch you below). Either way, guess I'll just have to save my mystery for these guys. Mutants Unite!

Zachopotamus

Dear Zachary,

I can't wait to meet you! Today is your birthday, and I am so excited I can barely sit still! I have to stay out in LA until tomorrow night, but I will come to meet you as soon as I can. I know you will have lots of sleeping to do before I get there. I am praying for you to come into the world safely. I know God has special plans for your life. You are such a special little man, who so many people already love before we have even met you. Since the moment I found out you were alive, I have waited for this day. Welcome my little Zachopotamus--I can't wait to kiss your fuzzy little head and sing you silly songs. I love you.

LaLa